Life with Fi

Sacrifice

2007-08-13T15:45:00.001-07:00

Today as I finished yoga, lying on the floor in relaxation pose, I almost fell asleep. I always come close to falling asleep. This time, though, I had this crazy flash back to child birth. My birthing instructor had us end every class with relaxation techniques that were to enable us to get through the pain of the contractions. She had told us that moms from her previous classes were even able to fall asleep between contractions right up the birth. I found this absurd. However when it came down to it, as I was 9 cm dilated with Fiona, sitting in a bath tub of warm water I was able to push myself in to fairly deep levels of relaxation. I never came close to sleeping, at least that I remember. I actually asked if it was too late for an epidural which wasn't really a rhetorical question. But the next morning, the nurse that was with me came in and told me that she had never seen anyone look so relaxed and peaceful while giving birth. I took it as a compliment and in turn said "well, I am glad I got to experience it but next time I am getting an epidural." I didn't really mean it. I was more than happy to feel birth. The 40 weeks of pregnancy were way more difficult for me. All good things come with a price tag. Whether it means sacrificing your body, pain, pride, whatever. The end result is all that matters.

My Rack and My New Rack

2007-08-10T18:53:00.000-07:00

So it is self-proclaimed "love your bike day" at my house. My day has consisted of giving only the best to my sweet little KHS. Don't tell it I would rather have a Clever Cycles Bakfiet.....it would crush her precious little soul. I digress. Anyhow, my day started off, picking up my newly tuned baby from Veloce bike shop on Hawthorne at 10:00 am. From there, I rode towards Mall 205, for maybe half a mile, until I realized "shit, no lock." at which point I turned around and headed back to my house to grab the bike lock from the Burley. I proceeded to backtrack again, toward my original destination of Mall 205. I always say that I can ride anywhere I need to go with exception to Target and Home Depot, so today I decided to put this theory to the test. I was in desperate need of some peg board accessories from HD and big girl panties from Target, not for me, duh! I hate panties. Digressing again.....So I figured small enough items to carry, no lumber involved...I am taking the bike. I hit Target first, loading up on big girl panties, a sippie cup, a conductors hat and train whistle for Fi and a hat for myself (total sucker for hats!) Then I almost managed to get to HD without stopping when Performance Bike shop sucked me in. I ended up leaving with some new tires, but they were half off and she needed them so she could go faster , faster, faster. Luckily I managed to get in and out of Home Depot without any excessive purchases, partly in fact that I had no more room to cram things and was already wearing a pair of tires over my shoulder. I got back home, put on my new tires and became obsessed with buying a new basket, so I hopped back on my bike and headed toward downtown. I stopped in to City Bikes where they trued my rear tire. I am sure it was not due to an operational error...and they gave me the bad news. No front basket, at least not the any of ones I was looking at, would work with my shocks, so I settled on a new rack which will soon enough have a pannier attached to it, unless I get too lazy and bungy a milk crate to it so that I can ride like Leon. Needless to say, my bike got some super extra special lovin' today and I never heard it complain once. And how gay am I hitting three bike shops in a day all while wearing this shirt?

Sushi, anyone?

2007-08-09T21:20:00.000-07:00

Fiona is the only toddler I know who eats sushi which says a lot considering I know some toddlers with pretty adventurous palates. Actually, this is the first time she has eaten the sushi with the nori wrap. I usually make her a roll with rice paper, instead. She ate two pieces, some sticky rice, grapes and a bowl full of edamame (as usual.) She was even able to use her beginner chopsticks to some degree, shown in the middle pic...pretty impressive, well at least this mama thinks so.

My beautiful butterfly

2007-08-07T13:59:00.000-07:00

Lately, when Fiona goes down for nap, I tell her to dream about puppies, pears, cookies, being happy and anything else I can think to tell her in sign language. Then I tell her I love her. She really enjoys signing, even though we haven't done much of it in a long time. We took a baby sign class when she was 6 months old but all she really ever wanted to sign was "puppy" and "more" so eventually we just stopped doing it all together. I am trying to find our sign sheets so that I can add some new things to the dream list. Of course, my office is a constant pit so that could take weeks. I love seeing her do the sign for "happy." And today, when I put her down and told her I loved her, she signed back and then put her arms up like she wanted a hug. When I leaned down to her, she grabbed my neck and whispered in my ear "berry much!" There is nothing like that! She is pretty darn amazing.

Waterfront Park

2007-08-01T21:33:00.001-07:00

Oregon Zoo

2007-08-01T21:28:00.001-07:00

Oaks Park

2007-07-24T22:27:00.001-07:00

12 Million Dollars Worth of Ice, Seriously?

2007-07-15T20:26:00.000-07:00

Pictures from the Mississippi Street Fair, the latest area of Portland to be encompassed by the gentrification process. Obviously a lot of outrage over the whole thing.....it makes it hard for the lower class to live in Portland. Hell, it makes it hard for people like me to afford a house when they start at half a mill.

So, in light of Woody Guthrie's recent birthday and the news of the 12 million dollars worth of ice we have been storing in running refrigeration trucks for the past two years, now unfit for human consumption. I decided to post a verse from "Christ for President". What is wrong with our culture? Our government? How many people would 12 million dollars feed or educate? Where are our GD priorities? I am heartbroken to hear of such a waste of money, energy....sick.

Every year we waste enough
To feed the ones who starve
We build our civilization up
And we shoot it down with wars

In another lifetime

2007-07-09T20:50:00.001-07:00

Do you believe in another lifetime? I just turned 32 and I haven't thought about my next lifetime for a few years....until someone brought it up to me the other day. I used to believe that there are old souls and new, that you had the opportunity to repair the past in the future, but why not repair the past in the current? I speak from first hand experience when I say that I have done many things in the past that I would change but how far do you go? I have spent the last year of my life trying to make amends with those I felt I have done wrong. I get very caught up in emotions and am extremely idealistic. I kind of feel like "Earl" apologizing to people that have no idea what I am even referring to. It makes me realize how self-consumed we are as human beings. We all have our own concept of reality and the same story can resonate completely differently from party to party. So far as my next life...this one has been pretty good to me. I often think there are things I would change if I could wiggle my nose and do so, but if there wasn't heartache, how enjoyable would the good times be? Enjoy the moment..........

My neighborhood is cooler than yours

2007-07-05T20:42:00.001-07:00

Fiona and I went to Sunnyside Environmental to play this morning and when we got home the much anticipated Sunnyside Neighborhood Newsletter was at my door. It comes once a month and is inevitably chocked full of all sorts of information that makes a person, like myself, smile. I live in a truly amazing place. First of all, it tells of the last meeting and how they showed clips from the film Portland:Celebrating America's Most Livable City as one of my fellow neighbors (an employee of PDX Office of Transportation) discusses on-street bike parking which will be going in soon on Belmont. Very cool. Other topics include an upcoming art stroll in September, the creation of the Sunnyside Sustainability Committee, details of the next Plastic Roundup, talk of the neighborhood swap shop co-op and other good stuff. My favorite article, however, is regarding the topic for our next neighborhood meeting on the 12th. ...."innovative community power generation and distribution opportunities." They want to create an energy "co-op" modeled after those used in Europe. Our neighborhood would be the first in the US to try such a thing. F-ing amazing. The article speaks of a pilot project in which they would convert the Sunnyside Environmental School's "current oil-fired boiler system to a carbon-neutral fuel coupled with integrated photovoltaic grid-tied electric. Excess energy would be used to heat and cool neighborhood residences, further integrating the relationship of the school as the center of the community." I am there. Rock on Sunnyside, you are rad!

The Portland Way

2007-06-30T14:49:00.001-07:00

Back in PDX and loving it. Things just happen differently here. June in Portland is Utopia. The weather is perfect. There are Farmer's Market three days a week, outdoor concerts nightly and weekly festivities at the River Front....not to mention all of the other smaller events around town. We have been to a Gay Pride Parade and The Multnomah County Bike Fair, which was the closing for Pedalpalooza, a two week bike extravaganza. Our favorite hang out right now is the Zoo. They have a train that takes you on a forty minute ride through Forest Park, which is lovely. So much to do and see that it is hard to stay indoors. Hallelujah!

Does Globalization = Greed?

2007-03-29T19:28:00.000-07:00

I was out running errands today while listening to NPR. They were discussing globalization and it's effect on our economy, workforce, etc. It really made me think. As a small business owner who produces a (self) manufactured good, I understand wanting to outsource the labor to a cheaper workforce. We live in a country where so many companies have their products manufactured overseas...........China comes to mind..............that is hard for the independent businesses to compete with the prices. Think Wal-Mart, Target, ROSS, Marshall's, Mervyns, Big Lots. There are discount stores everywhere. These stores set a standard for those of us do not have a the means to purchase everything we own from Sak's, Neimans or higher end department stores.

I set my prices as competitively as I can and still make nearly nothing (sometimes not even minimum wage) on each baby sling.....AND I have people tell me all the time that they can't afford to pay what I charge. What is someone in my position to do? Well, I am not sure, but I do know that I will probably have to raise my prices, thus eliminating even more of the potential baby sling buyers, so that I am able to compensate myself enough to justify taking time away from my family. However, I will not send work overseas or hire an illegal and pay them a fraction of what their time and work are worth. Sending work overseas may produce a cheaper bottom line, but it does not necessarily mean that the product is of the same quality, or that the person producing it is being paid a fair wage or being treated ethically. How could I morally send work to another country when there is unemployment in my own country?

Ultimately, it comes down to how deep I want my pockets to be, right? Well, fortunately for me, being kind and fair is more important than padding my pockets. I may not be a practicing (and by this I mean church going) Christian. I am not even sure that I would be considered a Christian at all, but I do believe in karma and the golden rule. I know that when I behave nicely, am considerate to those around me, treat others how I would like to be treated and am conscious of my impact on the planet, I receive the same respect in return. There is much more to life than how much money I take to the grave. I wish more people realized that. It breaks my heart to see my country and all of the ulterior motives......truly sad. We should be ashamed that we allow and support people who behave so awfully.

How does the saying go?

2007-03-27T19:20:00.000-07:00

Growing up, I remember my step-mom saying that there were only two things in life that were certain, death and taxes. I cannot remember exactly how she said it. I am sure it deviated from Mr. Franklin's original quote. None-the-less, I believed this up until this week. I am a member of Netflix and a total documentary addict. I love that they make recommendations based on ratings you give for other movies. This is the bomb. I have been getting some really fascinating things in the mail lately. The latest is "America:Freedom to Fascism." Sounded appealing enough. It discusses how the taxation of the American people on a Federal level is actually against the Constitution. And, subsequently, most states have a clause stating that anyone required to file a federal return must file a state return, so most people are not required to file either on their INCOME as wages. However, you are required to file on capital gains, which is fascinating to me, because by my guesstimate, most of the lower and middle class don't have much in the way of capital gains and therefore should not be subject to taxation, at least not by the IRS. Wouldn't it be grand if you woke up one day and there was a class action case against the IRS by all the little people....or the little people actually won and the only people who had to pay income tax were the really wealthy. I am not saying that there is anything wrong with being wealthy, but they should be paying more in taxes instead of cheating their way out because they can afford to. Oh my, did that just turn in to a rant? Bottom line, it is an interesting fact that not many people know and worth looking in to either way.

Adventures of a mother daughter team

2007-03-21T19:37:00.000-07:00

Fi is on Spring Break this week so no break for either of us. We have had a great time learning about gardening. We checked out several books from the library on the subject and planted a bunch of herbs, which she cannot pass without leaning over, swiping them with her hand and then smelling her hand. We have been laying mulch and planting annuals, as well. Like Mother like Daughter, right?
Speaking of......Today, we were on our way to the store when we saw a dog, Hallie, about to run out on to Utica. We stopped at the end of our street and watched her for a minute, worried that the traffic coming over the hill might not see her if she were to run out. We chased her, by car, until she turned back in to the neighborhood, at which point, I was finally able to coerce her in to the car. I called her owners and left a message, then dropped her in my back yard and continued on with my errands. Fiona was so sad that we didn't stay home to play with her, so we made a stop at Petco and took a tour of all of the animals there, while we were out. After about 6 hours, Hallie's dad returned my call and came to pick her up. By this point, Hallie, Lucy and Fiona were running in and out of the back door as they pleased, having a grand old time. I guess Fi thought she was here for good because she kept saying "baby dog" after she left. Unfortunately, Hallie had a two-legged sister at home that was crying b/c she thought she was lost, so I tried to relay the scenario to Fi, using her and Lucy as a parallel. It is never boring around here, that is for sure!

2007-03-13T11:32:00.000-07:00

What? You've never seen a 2 year old white girl with a Tupac shirt

2007-03-12T18:54:00.001-07:00

Fiona and I were at ROSS, doing a little browsing when we came across this shirt. I picked it up and put it back with a big smile, She, then, picked it up and hung it on the cart. I started to put it back and she said "my shirt." I finally gave in. I mean, who am I to squash a girl's style? She looks cute no matter what she is wearing. I did take her to Wild Oats today and Melissa at the cheese counter said, "You do know who the mama is right?" insinuating that I have ultimate control of what she does and in this case wears! Whatever, she likes it! Better a gangsta than a barbie.

One step forward, two steps back

2007-03-11T19:07:00.000-07:00

So, I went to drop off a sling to a woman here in town, on my way to pick up Fi from school the other day. I went inside for 10 minutes, tops, and when I came back out, someone had hit my car and knocked my driver's side mirror off. They must have been driving fairly fast because the actual mirror was about 15 feet away in the yard. It is so disappointing to me that someone would hit my car and not even leave a note. What kind of place do we live in? This is a nice neighborhood in midtown. I guess I was just at the wrong place at the wrong time. Unfortunately, I am afraid that my mirror will cost significantly more than the sling that I was dropping off. What a fricking bummer.

How very un-American of you to care about the environment

2007-03-09T13:38:00.000-08:00

I would just like to say that I am thrilled with IKEA's recent decision to start charging a nickel for every bag they provide customer's with at checkout. I wish that companies like Whole Foods and Wild Oats (who I think may be one in the same now) would take a queue from our Scandinavian friends and step up to the plate. Many of the natural markets are already giving bag credits or wooden nickels (WO) in the amount of five cents per bag for those that bring their own, but this takes it a step further, and in the right direction, as far as I am concerned. There is no need to contribute the amount of trash that we do from grocery bags because we are just plain lazy and unable to take our own bags to the store with us. The only way we, America as a whole, can be expected to do this is if we are forced to do so. =) So proud.........

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17507534/site/newsweek/from/ET/

Cutie Patootie

2007-03-07T08:01:00.000-08:00

Do kids get cuter than this? Seriously, I am afraid to have #2 because #1 has set the bar so high. I am ready for #2 but it looks like that will be on hold until the house sells and we get settled in Portland. I am so anxious. I don't want Fi and her counterpart to be too far apart in age, but I suppose I should heed my own advice and let things happen as they are supposed to. I have to go sew..................

Hiatus

2007-03-06T18:02:00.000-08:00

I have been on hiatus for quite some time, but I am trying to get back in the swing of things. I have been diligently working on my website and sewing in all of my free time, when I am well. Our whole family has been sick non-stop, which has forced us in to a decision...we are putting our house on the market April 1st and moving back to Portland as soon as it sells. I cannot wait to be back where we belong, where we fit in, where people don't try to run me over when I am walking to the grocery store (1. because there are sidewalks and 2. because they realize that pedestrians have the right away), where organic vegetables are sold at most of the markets, not one market in town, where I don't get confused looks, like I am some sort of alien when I pull out my canvas bags at the market, where the population is not 62% evangelical and where there are not 4 story praying hands and gi-normous crosses off of the highway. Ah, that felt good. Watch out Portland, the Kanaly's are coming home.

Portland trip

2007-02-07T18:31:00.000-08:00

Dan Zanes, Fiona's Icon

2006-10-30T10:08:00.000-08:00

So, it should come as no surprise that my daughter loves music. After all, look at her parents. We are music junkies. I think the hardest part about having a child, at least for us, was giving up live music. On one of Fiona and I's weekly trips to the Brookside Library, we found the Dan Zane's DVD "All Around the Kitchen." We were familiar with him from seeing the "Jump Up" video on Disney from time to time, so we checked it out. My daughter watched it continuously for the week we had it. When I took it back the following Friday, I thought that we should probably purchase this at some point. A couple of days later, Fiona and I went to Border's in search of the DVD, to no avail. We purchased a CD instead. I believe it is called "Catch That Train." Fiona loves the CD even more than the DVD. I did end up getting on to buy.com and purchasing the DVD and another CD a few days later. Now, my life consists of Dan Zanes in the play room, DZ in the car, DZ in the living room, DZ in the kitchen. My daughter wakes up and says "choo choo!?" every morning, even after nap. It goes on alllllll day. I think I listened to the CD three times and watched both the videos and show three times each, as well, on Friday. It is out of control. I do find myself fortunate that it was DZ and friends that she latched on to b/c I am not sure that I could handle any other children's artist that many times a day. Luckily, they rock and play great music. They are the kind of people that I would hang out with.....so hooray for Dan Zanes.

Zoooooooooooooooo

2006-10-15T18:10:00.000-07:00

We took Fiona to the Tulsa Zoo a few weekends ago and she, of course, loved it. It was only her third trip to the zoo....Pretty pathetic on my part, but it is half an hour away and we can't ever stay for long, so the pay off isn't always enough to make the trip. One more reason to leave Tulsa. That comment is for you, Scott. =) We had to pull Fi from the petting zoo. That was by far her favorite part. It is much nicer than the OKC petting (if you can consider sticking your hand over a 4'0" chain link fence petting) zoo.

Things are hectic around the Kanaly house. All the usual, work, work, chores and work. I don't want to be an adult anymore, unless I am a retired adult. I need a genie. Does anyone have one they can loan me? Fiona wants to be potty trained. I just can't find time to read the 300 page book that accompanies this phase so I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. Kris said the other night "oh, yeah, she's potty trained, but still on the boob." Hey what can I say? I didn't know there was a particular order I had to go in. I do what I can.

I am off for an adult night (or the rest of what is left of it) with my husband. It will more than likely be spent making lists of groceries and things to accomplish this week, though. Like I said, I am done with this adult crap.

Pics of the kids from Liz's wedding

2006-09-07T17:01:00.000-07:00

Just a couple of pics of the kiddos (Fiona, Delaney and Luke) tearing it up on the dance floor this past weekend. Luke is a dancing machine. He is Bo's (and Liz's now) nephew. Delaney is daughter to Katie Taylor. They are all between 18 and 20 months old so they had a blast together. My camera was dying so unfortunately my pics are less than stellar.

Missing Portland

2006-09-05T17:23:00.000-07:00

So, it has been 6 months in Oklahoma now. I can't say that I am sure why we chose to come back here. The weather is miserable, well, at least the heat of Summer. We live in a great neighborhood but there is nothing to do...nowhere to walk. When you do walk, people assume it is b/c you are poor, not that I care, just making an observation of the typical okie mindset. I miss Hawthorne. I wish I was walking around enjoying the lovely September weather..visiting with my mommie friends and Fiona's play pals.....buying GOOD cold beer for christ sake. I feel as though I am living in the buckle of the bible belt and judging by the 50 foot praying hands up the street, I feel I must be right. For now, I will make the most of it but I cannot make any promises as to how long I will last.

The Doodlebop Daze

2006-08-27T17:05:00.000-07:00

The last three pics are of Fiona watching the Doodlebops. Kris and I don't particularly like this show, but Fiona loves it. She becomes so focused for this half hour, more so than with any other show or activity...very strange. The top two pics are Fi and Kris Saturday morning creating art in the backyard.

Kids playing

2006-08-13T08:11:00.000-07:00

Lindsey and Ky, my sister-in-law and nephew, came over yesterday and the kids played in the yard. They had a great time running, jumping and pestering Lulu. Things are crazy busy around the house with all of the business stuff going on and Fi being on break from Mom's Day Out. We are trying to maintain.

Woodward

2006-08-11T22:05:00.000-07:00

This is a bit old. Kris, Fi and I had gone to the park because we heard from Chey that there was going to be "Art in the Park." We didn't see much art but had a good time nonetheless. Fi found a dog friend and danced while she listened to some musicians practicing under the pavillion. The whole family went on the swings together and then came back home.

Self Portrait: Fi and Mama

2006-07-23T09:34:00.000-07:00

Fi and I being silly in her play room the other day.

Last day of school

2006-07-22T17:35:00.000-07:00

Fiona had her last day of Mom's Day Out for the Summer session on Thursday. I am very sad about this. I have been sewing like mad while she is there and now I will have no uninterrupted crafting for five weeks. So, when I went to pick her up, Miss Rachael said "she is a biter." Apparently, my sweet little angel decided to bite (out of anger) two different children that day. This isn't that big of a surprise to me seeing as how she has been testing her limits with Kristopher and I for months now. I suppose it was only a matter of time. I asked the teacher if she had any suggestions on how to handle that. her reply was "You probably don't want to ask me. I don't read books. In my house if someone bites me, I bite them back. If my oldest pushes down one of the younger two, my husband goes over and pushes him down." Hmmm, I thought. It seems a little Hanibalistic to me, but I am also a "compassionate" so therein may l lie my problem. I can't honestly grasp the concept of punishing a child by hurting them to show them that hurting someone else is wrong. It is like that bumper sticker...Why do we kill people who kill people to show that killing people is wrong ( I am not sure if that is the actual verbage, but i used to have that when I was younger). Regardless, it seems silly to me. Discipline is a tricky thing. Trying to be 100% coinsistent, on the same page as your partner, and not screw up your child is a fine line that is very hard to walk. Hopefully it gets easier, but I doubt it. Anyway, if anyone reads this and has a suggestion, PLEASE leave it!

Peas please

2006-07-16T03:01:00.000-07:00

Fiona is still eating very well, lots of fruit and veggies. She still isn't too big into meat, though, she did have a Mexican pizza at El Chico yesterday and ate quite a bit. Fruit of any kind is favorite right now. Oranges, bananas, nectarines, apricots, plums and grapes are always in the fridge. Cheese, spinach bites, black beans, Horizon yogurt tubes and anything with Elmo on it are big as well. She only wants to eat Earth's Best snack crackers, cookies and o's b/c of the Sesame Street Characters on the box...good marketing! We haven't experienced the usual pickiness that most parents of toddlers tell me about. Her appetite is big and her palette is wide. I keep waiting for that to change and have my Super Baby Food book close at hand for when it does. There are so many clever toddler recipes in the pages of that book.

Three little monkeys.............

2006-07-15T18:49:00.000-07:00

............jumping on the bed. One fell off and landed smack on her right cheek. Yes, Fi's new favorite thing to do is to get right in the center of the bed and jump or dance. Monday, she fell off, hit her hip on the side rail and landed on her cheek. She has a bruise, though it is pretty faint. The very next day, also in the guest room, she somehow ran in to the partially ajar door with the same cheek. So above the bruise is a red line. It must be this age. She is going 90 mph and completely fearless. I caught her jumping from the ottoman to the chair today. She runs now, flat-footed, as fast as she can, bumping in to everything along the way. Practice makes perfect.

In my room

2006-06-26T19:52:00.000-07:00

And four months later...............

2006-06-21T18:15:00.000-07:00

So much has happened since I last posted. We moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma, bought a new house, Fi started Mother's Day Out, we bought a Subaru Outback Wagon which I love, Kris started freelancing, and a million other things. All in all, it is good to be back in the midwest/south, whatever you want to consider Oklahoma. I definitely missed the kindness of most of the people here. I didn't, however, miss the stupidity level of the redneck population. Geez...where do these people come from and can we please use them as poster children to get some more money for our education system. I think this state is ranked about 49th in education. Go figure. I won't get started on that right now. I am so tired. Fi has pneumonia and we are all a bit exhausted so I am going to call it a night and hop in to bed.

gDiapers

2006-02-26T21:30:00.000-08:00

Today, I went to New Season's. My favorite grocery store, and purchased something called gDiapers. It is kind of like a new option in diapering. Of course, there is cloth, which is what my mom did and I would love to do, provided our washer were capable of handling it and my patience level were higher...Then there is disposable. I feel guilty every time I put a diaper on Fi, knowing that this thing that I am throwing in the trash will be around probably 6 or 7 times as long as I will, approximately 500 years....Like we don't have enough to worry about. This third option, the gdiaper, is a cotton diaper cover with a plastic snap in liner. There is a cotton flushable liner that gets inserted in to the plastic liner to catch the "business." It is very cool!

I bought a starter kit which consists of two cloth diaper covers (in pairs of green and blue or orange and red,) four plastic liners and 10 flushable cotton liners. I got it on sale for 21.00. I think that is reasonable. You can purchase all of this online http://www.gdiapers.com/ if you do not live on the west coast. I hope that it gets to the middle of the country faster than I do, but I don't think that is possible, seeing as how I will be there in three days!

It is your obligation as someone who cares about your children and the future generations to look in to this excellent idea, so please take the time to do so and spread the word!

I have two days left to pack so I am freaking out and have to get some rest. Kris is at the Matisyahu show trying to talk to someone in the merch booth about doing a free poster for them to support that cause. If you haven't listened to Matisyahu, check him out at http://www.hasidicreggae.com/. It is very cool with a strong positive message, which is why we want to back it! There are a couple of videos that you can watch, one for "youth" and one for "king without a crown," both excellent, so check check check check it out!

Mama's Little Helper

2006-02-22T16:43:00.000-08:00

Fiona has been helping me pack up our belongings in preparation for our big move. We actually leave a week from today to fly in to Oklahoma City and then we will drive up to Tulsa the morning of the 2nd. We are very excited but very busy.

Woohoo........

2006-02-12T20:47:00.000-08:00

This is a deck that my hubby, Kris, painted for a local art show called "On the Wall" a couple of months back. Vans sponsored the event and our friend, Richard, curated it.

We received an offer on our house. Now, we just have to wait for the home inspection to clear and I will be on my way to T-Town to look for a new house. I am very excited, stressed out and feeling all kinds of different emotions at the same time. I just found out that the guy who owns SKYY Vodka, Maurice Kadmar, has purchased 106.6 million dollars worth or 30% of downtown Tulsa with revitalization in mind. Ironically, he thinks it will be "the next Portland." I am elated to hear of this investment and thinking of doing some investing myself. I just spoke with my realtor, Miss Jennie Sullivan and she said that she is dealing with some other investors from California right now who are putting their money in residential....hmmmmmmmmmmmm. I am definitely liking what I am hearing!

Best for breast

2006-02-08T10:25:00.000-08:00

I was watching the news the other day and they were talking about how Portland was rated the best or one of the best ( I couldn't hear all of it b/c someone was screaming in my ear) places to breastfeed. I am happy with the recent trends in breastfeeding. I am not sure if it the fact that a lot of women are having babies at an older age and frankly could care less what you think about them popping their boob out in front of you or if we are just a stronger group who refuse to be intimidated by people's glares and rude comments or if we are just better informed. Either way, it is a wonderful NATURAL act.

I get really frustrated with the negative attention that sometimes surrounds breastfeeding in public. It is absolutely preposterous to say that breastfeeding is indecent. Personally, I think that Howard Stern is indecent. I also think it is indecent when I see a 14 year old girls with her thong or butt crack hanging out of the top of her jeans, or most of the outfits I see in music videos these days, the new song by the Black Eyed Peas, or my 11 year old brother playing video games in which he is murdering people, stealing cars and picking up hookers, that is indecent..... I could go on and on. Let's face it, there is a lot of indecency in the world today. Breastfeeding may make some of you uncomfortable but I doubt a topless beach would.

I have rarely had to breastfeed in public b/c I am usually within walking distance of my home, but when Fiona was very little and couldn't wait 10 minutes, it had to happen. I would rather see women breastfeeding whenever possible than wasting their hard earned money on formula. If you can, why not. I have friends who have had trouble with it and that is totally understandable. I don't condemn those who aren't able to do it, but I think it is something that should be supported by the community. After all, it is allowing the kids a better start at life and creating a bond between mother and child that cannot compare to anything else.

Murphy's Law

2006-02-07T21:03:00.000-08:00

Murphy's law says that if you take the time to fix yourself up (shower, put on makeup, etc) 95% of the time before you leave the house, you will not run in to anyone you know or care to meet. It is the other 5% percent of the time, when you look your worst or are sick that you will run in to every person you know. I swear this is true. I feel like total crap, Fi is sick and we look the part today. I, intentionally took side streets to the movie store and got in and out of the grocery store as fast as possible. We ran in to six people we knew in 20 minutes.

Fi is feeling better. She still has a fever and runny nose but is breathing a LITTLE easier. She wasn't near as clingy as yesterday, but just as cranky! I, however, feel kind of yucky. I have been drinking C-filled smoothies right along side Fi, trying to make sure that I stay well, but I have had more than one snotty kisses today, so i am not holding my breath.

Oh, sick baby.......

2006-02-06T20:23:00.000-08:00

I took Fi to the doctor today. She feels so lousy. We don't know if she has RSV, a sinus infection or what the deal is but Dr. Barsotti put her on antibiotics. She threw up for the very first time tonight.....shells and cheese, peas and a smoothie, all over me, which was the least of my concerns, in all honesty. I held it together until she went to bed and then finally broke down and cried. It sucks to see your child in pain. She cuddled with me all day with one arm wrapped around my neck and the other around my shoulder for most of the day. As much as it breaks my heart to see her in pain, it felt good to just love on each other all day. I am hoping that she has a better night tonight than last. Poor sweetie.

Duck Pond...Quack Quack

2006-02-05T20:52:00.000-08:00

The sun decided to shine on Portland today, so we took advantage and went to the park. Here are a few pics we took at the duck pond. Fiona had a rough day today...feeling pretty crummy. It breaks my heart. I can hear her moaning and coughing right now actually. She is having a tough time sleeping. I should probably get to bed myself...looks like it could be a long night for both of us.

Fiona's Grandparents

2006-01-26T09:36:00.000-08:00

This is Honey and Big Daddy, also known as my mother, Kathy, and my other father, Mitch. They have been married for almost 24 years so I hate to use the word stepfather (it seems so distant.) And yes, they picked their names!

This is Papa G, or Mike, Kris's father and (my third father) with the little munchkin over the holidays.

This is Gege, aka Kris's mother, Pam, with their dog Killian when he was still a sweet little pup.

This is my other mother, Candy, who as of yet doesn't have a particular Grandma name because they are letting Fiona decide what she wants to call them on her own.

Lastly, this is my father, Francis, who like Candy hasn't chosen a name to be called so for now, he is Grandpa Foy.

It is totally hectic around here right now. We put our house on the market tomorrow. Fiona and Ella are napping right now and I have a work crew in the basement digging a trench to fix out foundation leak. I live in Portland, everyone has a leak in their basement. I actually think I fixed the leak when I added a bunch of compost and mulch to the yard this past weekend and re-worked the slope of the yard. I haven't seen any water penetration since I did that, but I want to make sure that it is done right before we sell.

Anyhow, I need to get some painting done while the girls are sleeping so I am off..............

Snack Time

2006-01-25T09:39:00.000-08:00

Falling leaves

2006-01-24T21:58:00.000-08:00

I took these pics of Fi the beginning of October at Laurelhurst park, up the street. I love these pics. She was so fascinated by all of the leaves. I actually took so long circling the park looking for the spot with the most leaves that she fell asleep in the stroller which is the last picture shown. So sweet.....

The Unfortunate and the Ungrateful

2006-01-22T19:18:00.000-08:00

This was Fiona's first trip to the beach. She was 7 months old. We went to Seaside, Oregon with Gege and Papa, Kris's parents. It was a lot of fun. Fi ate sand, of course.....And loved it. Lucy went too and she ran circles in the sand, herding every man, woman, child and animal in sight.

I was looking at a website last night and got sidetracked and again got sidetracked and ended up on some unknown blog. As I was scrolling down I read a headline about some woman who left her baby in the car while she went to a Jerry Springer show. After I was done on the computer, I turned on the news to a story about a father who killed his two month old daughter, followed by a story about parents who kept their 12 and 16 year old kids locked in a bathroom for three years and how they appeared half their age. I was becoming more sick to my stomach by the moment.

What is up with that? Hasn't anyone heard of adoption or abortion? I am not an advocate of the latter, but for crying out loud, I would rather see a spirit set free from the body before it is given a chance to be put on earth than see a child suffer from abuse and then set free from the material world. Why on earth do you keep a child that you obviously don't love and how is that even possible to not love your child???? I can't imagine life without Fiona, but in the days when a child seemed less appealing, I would never have behaved that way!

So then I started thinking about all of the cracked out moms using babies as a means to get more money from the system and how those children suffer. Meanwhile, there are all of these parents out there who want, more than anything in the world to have a baby of their own and they can't get pregnant. What injustice. These are the kinds of things that make me question "God" and his/her role in the universe. What kind of god would create such an unbalanced world? It doesn't make sense and it breaks my heart in to a million pieces. There is something about having a child of your own and then seeing these stories on the news. It is heart wrenching to watch. I constantly think about how horrible it would be for my child to suffer from whatever it is that the children on the news are going through. I can barely get through a day without crying from one story or another that i hear on the tele or net.

Also, I am starting to think that there is a direct link to the amount of violence that happens in the world and the increase in violence on television and in the theaters. If you are a sicko to begin with and you go to see a psychological thriller about a serial killer, like say "Seven" does it inspire you to do something even crazier than you had in your mind on the first place. I dunno, but i suspect that the far-fetched scenarios that play out on prime time, nightly, don't do anything other than help the weirdest reach a new weird. Enough about that. It makes me sick and that is that!

Health Inspector

2006-01-21T19:00:00.000-08:00

This is our resident Health Inspector. She checks the refrigerator periodically throughout the day to make sure that there are not any undesirables in it. She's pretty thorough. I think there must be something wrong with the Annie's Natural Honey Mustard because she keeps taking it out of the fridge and chewing on the lid or maybe she just really wants to try it....Not sure. She loves to be in the refrigerator. Every time I open it to pull something out she books it over and gets an arm in before I can close it...Typical Health Inspector!

I am hoping she can take over my duty as the family refrigerator cleaner-outer when she gets a little older. I am that relative that comes and stays at your house and while I am there, I check the expiration date of everything in your fridge and then you come home from work one day and I tell you that you need to go to the store because 80% of what was in there expired over a year ago and it is all in the trash now. I am so crazy about that. I think my mom might just wait for me to come to here house and do my bi-annual clean out. Actually, I think she plants things so that she knows that I am doing a thorough job because without fail there is a bottle of dressing that expired well over two years ago and it drives me crazy. I am always thinking, " I just did this 6 months ago, where did this bottle of dressing from 2001 come from?" It is a conspiracy I tell you.

I recently stayed with my in-laws for 11 days over Christmas and they had the pleasure of receiving their first ever Michelle Kanaly refrigerator purge. I guess I like to do it. I am in to cleaning and manual labor, anything that most normal people like to put off, I am on it...grocery shopping, cleaning, yard work. I guess that is why I am such a damn good house wife!

Homeless Hoopla

2006-01-20T19:08:00.000-08:00

Doesn't she look so little? This was our first camping trip with Fi. I think it was July or August... I can't even remember at this point. We went to Oswald Lake in SE Oregon. It was at a pretty high elevation and really cold at night, but a lot of fun. We went with three of Fiona's friends and their parents....Very interesting. I can't wait to go again, weather permitting.

So, I have to vent. Apparently, Portland, is the best place in the country to be a homeless person. There are so many bleeding hearts here that we just support the homeless without any opposition. I have definitely become a little jaded on the topic since I moved here. Hell, ten years ago I couldn't pass a homeless person on the street without giving them money. Now, I threaten them within an inch of their lives for ringing my doorbell and spare changing me in the privacy of my own home. That is absolutely unacceptable.

Last week, two days after I had just cleaned out my cupboards and had two sacks full of food, someone knocks at the door. I look out to see a shopping cart at the end of my sidewalk and decide not to answer. The knocking continues and it gets louder, then the doorbell rings...Persistent little bugger! I have both of the girls, so I hesitantly answer. This woman asks me if I have any plastic or glass that she can have. I look at her and then I look right next to her shopping cart at my empty recycling bins turned upside down that were just emptied that morning and say "uh, no!" She then proceeds to ask for money. I, in turn, offer up my two bags of food. She has the nerve to ask what is in them and if she can see it. I said "no!!!' and slammed the door in her face. How ungrateful. This is how the homeless is Portland are, though. They are greedy jerks.

That is the third time someone has come to my door asking for money or totally tweaking asking to mow my lawn in the past year. I am not down with that. They are lucky I don't believe in having a gun, because they wouldn't make it off of my property, if I did.

Today, I was on my way to pick up Kris from work, when I was stopped at a red light in China Town. I looked over at the line wrapped around the building of a local mission.....So many people waiting for a hot meal, all smoking cigarettes. Are you kidding me?? What do smokes cost these days, 4.00 a pack? That is enough to feed a person for a whole day if you eat fruit, veggies, bread and fresh foods. I feed my whole family for about 15.00 a day and we eat mostly organic, so i know it is possible. But, these people would rather keep the money that they guilt the naive few in to giving them so that they can smoke and drink and support their drug habits, while we the taxpayers feed them, clothe them and pay for their health care expenses that they incur from abusing their bodies. That is screwed up.

Ah, I just needed to get that off of my chest. I am done feeling sorry for them. I can't help someone who can't help themselves. Crap, I tell you!!

Queen of the Laundry Basket

2006-01-17T09:36:00.000-08:00

Here is Fiona playing with Dada and the empty laundry baskets. She was in rare form this evening. We were so busy that day that neither her nor I changed in to clothes suitable for leaving the house. We just hung out in our pj's all day. This particular evening was a perfect example of why kids don't need as many toys as they have. They enjoy using their imaginations. I had just put up two loads of laundry when she walked over to the stacked baskets and wanted to get in. Dad picked her up, sat her in and zoomed her around the house until he was breathless and she was laughing hysterically.She found the hat in a drawer in the kitchen that is reserved specifically for the munchkins stuff. Whenever she drags something in to the kitchen and leaves it, I throw it in the bottom drawer. This time, she found her pink corduroy hat and a couple of puzzle pieces in there. The puzzle pieces were the square and circle from the wooden Melissa and Doug shape puzzle. She took turns with each shape, sticking them in her mouth and walking around. After a while, Kris and I decided that she was using them in place of her binky (which doesn't come out of her room or the car these days). They have the big knobs on them and she was sucking away! Silly girl.

On a completely different note, I am so excited for American Idol tonight. I am pathetic, but that show just sucks me in every time. I really like that there are so many different emotions tied to the show. You can be so happy for people who are getting a chance at their dreams and then laugh like crazy at the side show freaks! I don't normally watch many shows religiously....None actually. I used to watch Jeopardy every night and over the years have been a big ER and X-Files fan. I also really enjoy Arrested Development. However, last night and the night before I spent watching the 24 season premiere and it was so INTENSE that I managed to get through about 3 of the 4 hours of the premiere. It is a great show, but I feel like I am going to have a heart attack most of the way through it. Now I feel like every Monday and Tuesday I will be glued to the television between the two of them.....Damn FOX!!!

Animal Activist

2006-01-15T19:30:00.000-08:00

Do you think it is possible that a love of animals is hereditary? I know plenty of people who flat out hate dogs or cats.....and then there are people like my self, who love them. When I lived in Norman, Oklahoma, my friends sometimes referred to me as Saint Francis (of Assisi) because everyone knew that if they found a stray animal, they could dump it in my yard and when I got home, not only would I be excited to find a new pet but I would take it on as a personal challenge. I have found homes for so many pets, it is ridiculous. i have spayed, neutered, de-wormed, de-flead and fattened up more than my fair share. I have never had more than two of my own at a time, except for maybe when I was a child and our cat had kittens.At that point I think we had a dog and maybe 8 cats but that didn't last long. My father, is a sucker for dogs and cats as well.

So over the holidays, we were visiting my in-laws and they have a dog, but they don't treat animals the way that animals were treated in my family, not that that is bad! My family has a tendency to get pushed out of bed my their subordinate friends. They have this boxer, pictured above, that is a total spaz....But so sweet. He has to stay in an area of the hall that is blocked off on on end by the end of the hall where two doors close and at the other end is a cage. Fiona would go check on him and give him kisses. I swear in this picture he was telling her how to break him out!

She loves animals too. When she wakes up from nap, the first thing we do is check on Lucy, who is always napping on the left end of the couch. Dog was the first sign she learned in sign language and her third word. She adores Lucy, always wanting to cuddle, pet, climb on and kiss her.

Being just like her in this respect, it concerns me a little bit, because I have a scar on my nose from when I was about year or so older than her and my grandmother's Husky bit me. I lied and told everyone that I was climbing on the fireplace and fell off. Yes, I lied to keep the dog out of trouble and I still have a scar 28 + years later. I also have a scar from a cat bite on my lip and a lizard on my nose. The point is, I have always been very affectionate towards my animals....Apparently too affectionate, I suppose and I don't want her to end up with scars all over her for the same reason.

Thank dog Lucy is so patient!

How sweet it is............

2006-01-14T21:39:00.000-08:00

I took this picture last Monday. I cannot believe how cute she looks, like such a little girl. Every month or so, there is that one picture that really catches you off guard. This would be that one. I looked at it in the car as we sat at a stop light on our way to pick up Dada from work on Friday and thought "oh my god when did her hair get that long?" I also thought how she looked just like Shelby, Kris's youngest sister. I just want to eat her up. Speaking of, that is her new thing...eating us up. If we are lying down, she walks over like a drunken sailor, belly flopping on to our face as though she plans on suffocating us and as she distracts us with her shrilling scream she leans over and bites you.....me on the forehead and Kris on the nose. I am not sure why there is a different preferred place on each of. It is naughty actually, the biting thing, but the way she goes about it is so funny that you are usually laughing while trying to tell her "no" which I am sure is pretty ineffective.

I have been teaching her where her belly button and nose are so she loves to see people's bellies....and she keeps trying to touch Ella's nose while she is over, which makes me crazy because I feel like I have to hover over the two of them sometimes so that she doesn't accidentally fall and poke her in the eye.

I worked on the basement all day today. It almost looks like a bigger mess than I started with but I know I had to have made some progress. What a big job! It was so dirty that I went to Home Depot this morning and picked up a 12 gallon shop vac and one of those 39 compartment organizers for all of the screws, nails, washers and miscellaneous junk that was stretched from one end to the other on the work bench. I finally know where all of the drill bits are! The shop vac ROCKS! I love it. I can tell we will be very good friends. I can't wait until we have a rain-less day so that I can give it a try on the cars interior. We have had a stomach bug for the past 24 hours and I am ready to crash so off to bed I go.................

Somer's Wedding Date

2006-01-13T08:48:00.000-08:00

My little sister, Somer, and her fiance, Gary, have set a date for their wedding. Mom called two days ago to see if Fiona could be a flower girl on December 9th. That sounds like trouble to me, but I am sure she will be adorable. I can just see her shoving flowers in her mouth as she walks down the isle, visiting all of the people in the rows along the way. This is a picture of them that I took at Fi's birthday party. He is very sweet and a welcome addition to the family. I know he will treat her like she deserves to be treated. He has a good ol' boy feel and is one of the few remaining men out there with an ounce of chivalry which is always a plus.

Right after the wedding, the whole family is going to Montana for Christmas. My Aunt Carol and Uncle Larry who live in Tacoma, WA have a house in the mountains and they have rented another house on their street for the week, so all of my aunts, uncles, cousins from Oklahoma will be there. I cannot wait. It will be a lot of fun. We can walk across the street from the houses to the best cross country skiing in the nation, so I really want to give that a whirl. I have never been downhill skiing because of my knees....I am still "sitting on that". I would hate to have to have knee surgery #3.

It will be a nice break from the usual shuffle. I look forward to cooking big meals, maybe doing some knitting and just enjoying my family. Hopefully it will be better than our Opryland Christmas in Nashville...Good god!

First Snow

2006-01-08T18:56:00.000-08:00

The morning before Fiona's first birthday it snowed in Oklahoma City. It was her first time in the snow. It was also my nephew, Khairee's first experience with snow. They were so funny......So cute. Ky ran around in circles as he loves to do and Fiona just watched with her big bright eyes.

We also celebrated Christmas with my mother, step-father, brother, sister and soon to be brother-in-law later that morning. They live in Texas and we have so many families that we had to do Christmas three different days. As we opened presents in front of a huge picture window, huge flakes were coming down. It was one of those warm fuzzy moments, at least for me. I can't even remember a Christmas in my lifetime that it snowed on or around Christmas. Of course, it was 73 degrees with 40 mile an hour wind two days later, but that is the great plains for you.

My sister gave her the outfit she is wearing for Christmas. It totally rocks. It is a camouflage hooded sweatshirt with pants to match. Aunt Somer put Fiona's name across the back in Vato (Calligraphy) letters with rhinestones. there is a gold beveled star on one cuff and a rhinestoned cross on the front chest area. The pockets are trimmed in rhinestones and there a couple red hearts in various areas, as well. I think it is my favorite present...And it wasn't even to me!

I am so glad our generation has gotten beyond the whole baby blue and powder pink for babies. What a drag to have to look at those colors day in and day out. Funny enough, older people mistake her for a boy all the time when she is not dressed in pink, even if she has on striped tights or a red skirt.

That is why I view the baby slings I make as an extension of MY wardrobe, not another indicator of my child's gender. For crying out loud, enough with the blue teddy bears and crap! Seriously, how many of you mom's out there want to wear a jacket covered in blue teddy bears or trucks? So, why would you wear a sling covered in them? Sorry, that drives me mad. I am more than my toddler.

73 degrees and sunny

2006-01-06T14:34:00.000-08:00

I just like to look at this picture of the sun beating down on a day like today. Portland is rainy, go figure, right? I think we might just be on the road to a record from the looks of it. Every time I check out the ten day forecast it is rainy, heavy rain and mid-40's....lovely. You know, I have actually acclimated to the rain finally and seeing as how I am swamped with indoor work, it doesn't much matter to me if it is raining. Unless........I have to walk to the store. I have now broken a record for the longest amount of time an undeveloped roll of a film has managed to survive in my purse. That is when you know it is too yucky to do much. I don't mind the rain, but I feel bad getting out in it when I have Fi in the sling and to be quite honest, she is not too big on the stroller these days, especially when I enclose her in the large vinyl rain shield. I usually just throw a hoody on her and shelter her face if it is raining too hard. My first preference, however, is to just stay in the house. I am going to research is there is a an anti-rain dance.

Cleaning Protocol when Selling a House

2006-01-05T19:18:00.000-08:00

So, I am preparing to put our house on the market and I began on the kitchen today.....Nothing major, just replacing the hardware and cleaning. I always end up way deeper than intended when cleaning. I went from replacing the hardware to pulling everything out of every cabinet and drawer, creating a trash, garage sale, pack now and pack later pile to cleaning all of the spice jars and dusting the ceiling. Mid way through this, I thought to myself "Why I am I going to this much trouble to make the insides of the cabinets and drawers immaculate? Will anyone actually notice?" When we moved in here, it took me an eternity to clean that kitchen. It looked like they had been slinging soup or curry or some other runny food all over the walls. It was disgusting. I guess I feel like it is common courtesy to clean the house you are selling. Unfortunately, I am not sure where to draw the line. When they show my house will it need to be spotless? Am I going to go crazy trying to keep it clean in the process? I have never sold a home before, so I am not sure what the protocol for this kind of thing is. I am just trying to take it day by day, scratching one thing off my list at a time.

Toddler Behavior

2006-01-04T16:41:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine, Terrie, just started a new job today and I agreed to watch her daughter, Ella, while she is in the office for 10 hours a week. Ella and Fiona are three days apart, both on the Sagittarius-Capricorn cusp. Fi being the Sag (12/20) and Ella being the Capricorn (12/23). I have only had the two of them by myself one other time, before either of them were walking and it was a little difficult then, but Ella is now full on walking and Fiona is cruising along in that direction, so it was an all new dynamic. I find it fascinating how babies so close in age can be so similar yet so totally different. Fiona is a very good natured baby, so happy most of the time, but intense. She is a lot like her mother, I must admit. Lat night while I was cooking a big Indian dinner, she played by herself in the kitchen. She has a ton of magnets on the fridge. She took a handful of them off and placed them in my mixing bowls that were on the wire rack next to the fridge. Then she moved them all to the large glass measuring cup on another shelf... then back... and back again....Over and over for about 20 minutes as I watched in amazement. I am self-diagnosed OCD and I am going to go ahead and diagnose her after that episode. Ella, on the other hand is so chill. She takes one toy out and plays quietly for a while, then maybe goes back for another 30 minutes later. You hardly even know she is there. I am excited about taking care of her because I think it is great for each of them to have social interaction with another little one their own age. They can push each other developmentally, which will be nice.

Aside from that, Kris and I are just plugging away at our websites and trying to address all of the repairs we need to do on our home before selling it. Though they are few in number, it is still very hard to find the time to paint, landscape and fix things up. On that note, I must go paint!

Idealistic Parenting

2006-01-03T10:01:00.000-08:00

I just took Fiona in for her 12 month shots. It was hellish, of course. She had to get four in all and she cried harder with each one, until she was beet-red in the face. It is amazing to me how it is so easy to be idealistic about things concerning the children that you don't have but as soon as you pop one out, it changes so rapidly.

I had no intention of getting Fiona immunized before she arrived, scared by the thimerasol and it's link to autism as well as other risks. I also never intended to be induced or have any drugs in labor or give her fluoride or allow her to have millions of toys or watch TV, etc. I did have to be induced, but not with drugs. My midwife burst my water and the rest progressed naturally without any drugs or intervention with exception to a couple of blood pressure tests. That was intensely painful but I would do it again and will, I imagine. I quickly gave in to the immunization argument, deciding that keeping her alive was my ultimate goal and the percentages of children who have ill effects from the shots is very small. Also, the thought of what could happen if everyone decided not to vaccinate seemed far fetched but scary to say the least. It seemed (and this is MY personal opinion) selfish of me not to do it. Shortly after she was born, I had more clothes and toys than I knew what to do with since she is the only grandchild on my side and my mother has a shopping problem. Now, my living room looks like a day care and I spend ten minutes after dinner rounding up toys from under the couch, chairs and dog to throw them in the basket which gets dumped immediately in the morning. I do let her watch Baby Einstein and Brainy Baby videos as well as PBS when I need a couple of minutes to myself.

Basically, I have decided that there is no point in setting unreasonable goals. It doesn't have to be black or white. Life is a balancing act. IF I need to occupy her by putting her in front of an educational video for a few minutes so that I can run and grab the cleanest clothes from my bedroom floor to dress myself, it is not going to ruin her life. Hell, I had a TV in my room from 18 months old and I think I turned out alright. The one thing that I would change is all of the toys. It is hard to tell people not to buy your child toys, though, and I don't want to seem ungrateful because we are very grateful for everyone's generosity but she is honestly happiest with a couple of plastic measuring cups, an empty box or a balloon. I am starting a 529 for her in hopes that I can persuade family and friends to put their money where it really counts...In to her education, if they are so inclined to spend money on her. We will see how that goes.

New Year, Old Issues

2006-01-02T21:49:00.000-08:00

Each year, I make a New Year's Resolution. Usually it has to do with exercising more, as this year's does. My goal for this year is to do yoga three times a week. That seems like a reasonable goal, right? Yoga is such rewarding exercise for both the mind and body and I can see good results after only about three sessions, so it seems like it would be a no-brainer.

However, I am already off to a bad start. It seems that I can't find a good time to do it. I would do it before Fiona gets up, but she wakes up between 5:00 and 6:30 am on average and let me just say that I am not quite that ambitious. Naptimes would seem to be another prime candidate if I weren't already trying to cram in a shower, checking my emails, paying bills, cleaning, laundry, sewing baby slings and blankets, working on my business website and sometimes dinner prep (if I am lucky enough to get a break that time of day.) Thank God Christmas is over, because I was also having to shop during that time or get everything ready and in the car to go out shopping when she would wake. By evenings(actually, at straight up 5:00 pm, as my husband would add in) I am ready for a glass of wine and ready for some relaxation which usually adds up to more work either around the house or business related.

Even if I wanted to do yoga before bed, is it really acceptable to do yoga after having a glass of wine. I feel weird about that. Such are the dilemmas of life, I suppose. It is all about prioritizing, which I seem to have issues with. I am a worker, always have been. My dad is a worker and so is my mom. We are all a little neurotic and obsessive about things being perfect. Perfectionism is a double-edged sword.

I start to think back to my single days. What did I do with all of my time? Before a full time job or a significant other.....I used to sit at the bagel shop and read while smoking cigarettes for hours on end. I would go to The Deli to do homework at 3:30 in the afternoon so that I could discuss whatever assignment with BBQ Bob, my very over-qualified bartender and friend. I would craft, garden, hang out with friends, nothing of great importance in the over all scheme of things, but I enjoyed life. I still enjoy life, but in a very different way.

I view time the same way I do money. The more you have, the more you spend. The less you have, the better you are able to budget what you have.

Fiona is a punk rocker, fiona is................

2006-01-01T19:30:00.000-08:00

This is the love of my life....Fiona Isabella Kanaly. She just turned one on December 20th. I have no idea where the past year has gone, but I do know that it has been a crazy, wild ride. She is the happiest little thing ever....Always smiling and giving kisses. We just got back from Oklahoma City where my husband, Kris, and I are originally from. We were there for 11 days. It was too long and too short at the same time.

I love Portland for all of the wonderful things that it has to offer, but Oklahoma is where our roots lie. Family is such an important part of life and I think it takes moving 2000 miles away from them for that to truly sink in, at least for me. Our current plan is to move closer to them come Spring. We are looking to move to Tulsa, which has more to offer from a cultural standpoint than OKC. I am excited at the thought of being near friends and family but saddened by losing Portland. We live in the best neighborhood and our location affords us the ability to walk everywhere, which is drastically different from Oklahoma. If you are afoot in Oklahoma, people think you are poor or your car must have broken down. I mean, why would you voluntarily walk, right? Another thing about Portland, or Multnomah County, rather, that impresses me is that for the third year in a row, it has the highest circulation of any public library system in the nation, checking out 19.4 million books per year. That equals out to 28 books for every man, women and child in the county. No wonder it is such a progressive city/county. I wonder what the stats are for Oklahoma County. I doubt they come anywhere near those of PDX. I will have to check in to that......................